Make Your Bed


An Amazing Retreat

I had the privilege of spending the weekend at the Birth Boot Camp “Be Amazing” retreat. It was an incredible two days filled with inspiration, motivation, kindness, and a good dose of reality. We laughed, we cried, we hugged, and we found strength and support in a room full of like-minded women.

There is something so comforting about being among your people – the folks who feel as you do and work toward similar goals. In a room full of doulas and childbirth educators, there is a deep connection. We are all women who work on empathy – who feel deeply and strive towards improving the birth experience for all women and their families. It is easy to feel charged up for our work in that environment. It’s harder to bring that into everyday life.

I came home feeling energized and also incredibly drained. That was a whole lot of very social time for me in a short period (also visited family over the weekend) I’m an introvert, by nature. I recharge best in my own hidey-hole. Today, I want to do nothing more than climb into my bed and stay there for the day.

Make Your Bed

But, our founder, Donna Ryan, challenged us all to make our bed each morning. She feels it is the first step to being organized and getting things done in your day. Having made that effort this morning, I am now more driven to stay upright so perhaps it’s working.

I find myself pondering that made bed, however.

First, I am rubbish at making a bed. I can’t do it well. It always looks like a twitchy two-year-old was heavily involved in the process. Add to the fact that we don’t actually have “proper” bedding, the reality that at least one piece of the bedding we do have is inevitably in the wash (we are done with the twitchy two-year-old phase of life and all that accompanies that, however, we have far more animals than can be considered responsible and they are always on our bed) and it’s just never close to what I feel a made bed should look like.

Second, someone – whether two or four-legged – will mess it up before I go back to it this evening and I fall prey to the doubt that there is benefit in doing something that will be undone so quickly.

Does it still count as the accomplishment I look for?

The  End Goal

Isn’t this what we all ask as we face the drudgery of daily life? It’s hard to keep going day-in and day-out doing the same things repeatedly – working forever with no visible outcome. It’s easy to get lost in motherhood. The same can be said of labor. The contractions keep coming. One after another after another. It is so important to know that each contraction is one you never have to do again. It is over and it takes you one step closer to the end goal.

And so, that bed is made. I did it. I made the effort. I may even get a little better at it. If I resist the urge to crawl back in today, perhaps tomorrow will be easier. Perhaps in a month I will have accomplished new things. Perhaps, I need to look at the unmade bed as the “perhaps” – a made bed is an actuality. “Perhaps” needs to slip behind me. “Perhaps” needs to be tucked into the corners of the mattress where it can’t come out and flap lose in the wind.

Tomorrow, it will be easier. Tomorrow already has one goal I know I can accomplish.